In part 1 I talked about how the treatment of children in
this country is a huge problem, and really goes against the national principle
of Botho on which Tswana society and Botswana is based on. I don’t think theres
something inherently wrong with Batswana,
I think this is due to a severe lack of mental health awareness and
services. To clarify, when I say mental health, I mean things like stress
reduction and coping techniques, support systems, and counseling, as well as
psychiatric services and medication.
I feel like people in this country are traumatized. Not
everyone, but many, especially in rural areas. They are traumatized by lack of
family support systems, systematic and cyclical physical and sexual abuse, and
profound loss. There is no mental health system or even awareness of mental/emotional
health needs. Children are taught to
bottle up their emotions from a young age, so people don’t deal with their
feelings. I feel like what Peace Corps should be sending here above all else
are mental health professionals and counselors. My working assumption is that at
least half the people I interact with probably have some level of
post-traumatic stress disorder from losing loved ones and/or abuse, and then
having no way to work through such trauma.
I don’t think it was always like this. I’ve read and heard
stories about Botswana from 50-60 years ago, and it seemed like there was more
of a village culture and intact families and support systems, even though there
was much more overall poverty and less development. But development changed
some of that, as well as the AIDS epidemic. Half a generation was wiped out.
Family structures got messed up badly. Grandparents and young teenagers were
raising kids. Since ARVs have become available, the death rate from HIV has
plummeted. But in some ways, the damage has been done. There is a generation
traumatized from so much loss, and they are now raising children. But they
haven’t really dealt with their own trauma, so it’s hard to be a good parent,
let alone raise emotionally healthy kids. Lots of kids suffer from neglect,
especially in the rural areas. Marriage rates are very low due to the high cost
of getting married, so almost every woman I know has one or more children
before getting married, if she gets married. The kids often have different
fathers. This considerably messes with the traditional family structure and
support system. Kids no longer have aunts and uncles helping initiate them into
adulthood and explaining sexuality to them, so in most cases no one has these
conversations with them. This contributes to high HIV infection and teen
pregnancy rates, and the cycle continues.
I don’t want people to think I’m bashing Tswana culture,
because I’m not trying to. I understand that it’s different than American
culture. And I’m certainly not trying to compare it to American culture and
suggest that America has everything right- I could write (and there are
written) books about the societal problems in America. In Tswana culture, men often had multiple
wives, something the government is trying to discourage now. Extended family
plays a big part in raising kids, and that’s been disrupted by both HIV and
development with people moving around. Traditionally it seems people weren’t
supposed to be overly emotional in public, but there were places they could
show emotion, such as at church and funerals. They had a support network of
their village and their extended family. The point is… the way this culture
was, seemed to work pretty well for them. But things have changed and it’s not
working well anymore.
One symptom of this I see in children and adults is
emotional numbness. When you are taught to bottle up your emotions and not
feel, or when so much trauma happens you don’ know how to deal with it, you
start acting impassively when emotional things happen. It makes it hard to have
an emotional connection in relationships. But it’s a coping mechanism to deal
with further trauma. I see this when teachers at my school mention someone
died, with no emotion in their voice at all. And then move onto a new topic 30
seconds later.
There aren’t easy solutions to any of this, and to suggest
there are is to minimize the pain that these people have been through and are
still going through. But I really
believe that the first step is talking about it. Talking about how children are
treated in this country, and mental health in general. The countries that have
made the most progress in their fight against HIV are the ones that
acknowledged the problem existed and prepared to address it, not the ones that
pretended it didn’t exist. I think the
same thing applies here.
As this relates to me, this ugly stuff under the surface is
part of why it’s such an emotional roller coaster to live here. People (and
Peace Corps) tell us we are so lucky to be in Botswana, they are so good at
development and look at all the progress they’ve made! And that is true, and
also not the whole truth. In one day I’ll teach 2 classes where kids stare and
me and won’t talk, see starving dogs roam the village, watch a student get
caned for some infraction, see kids having a ball playing soccer, talk with a
friend about America, listen as people talk with no emotion in their voices
about boys beating girls for sex, and marvel that my rural village has 2
schools, a clinic, running water, and electricity. It’s up and down, good and
bad, all the time.
I want to do my part in raising awareness about the
treatment of children and mental/emotional health, which is why I decided to
post this. It may seem weird to combine the two, but I firmly believe that
unmet mental health needs are contributing to the maltreatment of children
here. These are not bad people. These are a peaceful, respectful people. These
are my friends. Hurt people hurt people.
I hope I haven’t insulted anyone by writing this, especially
if they are a Motswana. But the part of the ambassador’s letter that got to me
the most was the end, where she wrote “As for me, Botswana and its
young people are now in my heart for good. For the rest of my life, I will be
cheering you on.”
Me, too.
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